Through The Looking Glass
I stood before a mirror looking in.
It was dimly lit and hard to see.
I saw what little I could of my reflection and cringed.
What stared back at me made me ashamed.
I dropped my gaze for it was too much to bear.
The girl I saw was messy. Angry. Timid.
Insomnia plagued her, causing hallucinations.
Seeing things that were not there,
But being unable to clearly see what was.
She was dirty, bruised, guilty, and unloved.
Unwanted, worthless, shameful and ugly,
It made me ask, “How could anyone desire someone like me?
Someone who sins more than I can bear,
Who does what I know I shouldn’t,
And doesn’t do what I know I should?
A woman who has worked so hard to be good,
But whose efforts proved to be of no value.
Could God ever love me if I keep falling short?
Or do I just keep trying…or maybe stop?”
Despair was her best friend along with fear-
Fear of not being genuine, of not being sincere.
“I think I have repented, but I am not sure
If I repented enough to make it count.”
Fear of losing favor, of making Him turn from her,
Of experiencing His wrath and His displeasure,
Made life miserable. It made her weep.
Until one day, without even noticing,
A hand reached through that looking glass,
And pulled me to the other side.
As I looked at the girl on the other side,
Everything had changed!
The girl I saw now no longer was ashamed,
She was clothed in white, no longer in shambles.
She was clean, healed, and no longer guilty.
Loved. Valuable. Beautiful.
Rest was hers as she knew to Whom she belonged,
For now in the reflection I could see another.
I stepped closer and saw a Man.
My reflection dimmed as I took another step,
and I saw Him more clearly.
It was His clothes that covered my shameful, naked body,
And His love that washed the filth and healed the bruises.
The girl I saw looked rested, eyes no longer blurred,
And well nourished by the Bread and the Word.
She no longer feared for she was safe in Him,
And His favor never left, because it wasn’t hers to earn.
For as I stared at this image of two,
I took another step forward and found only one.
I could only see the Man reflected back at me now,
Standing and smiling, his love pouring out
So evident I could feel it and nothing else,
Which caused me to close my eyes and relax.
Feeling the goodness and grace of the Man in the mirror,
Told me it wasn’t myself I saw, but Christ,
The All in All. Christ for Me.
I could no longer see the battered and bruised,
The messy, fearful, insomniac.
Because I was no longer that person, for she was made new.
Through the in-dwelling of the Holy Spirit,
It was not me in the mirror, but Jesus.
He had clothed me,
Wrapped me in His robes of righteousness,
So when He looked in that glass, he saw only Himself,
And no longer did she live, but Christ in her.
1 Corinthians 13:12-13
For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known. But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love.
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